For the moment, the schedules are
not downloadable, but you may certainly copy
and paste (you may have to reset tabs and spaces).
We anticipate making these available for download
very soon.
There are 3 schedules to choose
from:
In-State (less than
45 miles apart)
In-State (greater than
45 miles apart)
Out-of-State
Or go back to:"Committee Information", "Approved Forms", or "Welcome
Page"
Model Parental Time
Sharing Schedule
(Suggested In-State Where the Parents
Reside No More than 45 Miles Apart)
Basic Assumptions and Goals
This schedule assumes that the parents are prepared to share the difficult
responsibility of raising children in separate homes and are mature
and responsible enough to do so. Shared parental responsibility means
that each parent has full rights and duties with respect to their child(ren).
The parents must confer with each other so that major decisions affecting
the child(ren) are made jointly. Issues dealing with school, discipline,
religious upbringing, and health are examples of areas where the parents
must confer. Each parent is entitled to the child's medical, dental,
and school records. Florida Statute þ 61.13 (2)(b)(3) specifically
requires that "access to records and information pertaining to a minor
child, including, but not limited to medical records may not be denied
to a parent because the parent is not the child's primary residential
parent."
This schedule is designed to help accomplish three goals: 1) to assure
that child(ren) of parents who do not live together will have an opportunity
to develop a relationship with each parent that will be loving and
meaningful, 2) to permit each parent to spend as much quality time
with their children as is consistent with the child's developmental
needs, and 3) to give guidance to the parents as to what is expected
of them regarding their obligations to the other parent.
If this Parental Time Sharing Schedule is to be successful, the relationship
between the parents must be businesslike. THE CHILD(REN) IS NOT TO
BE EXPOSED TO HOSTILITY, CONFLICT, RECRIMINATIONS, OR ARGUMENT BETWEEN
HIS/HER PARENTS. FURTHERMORE, THE CHILD IS NOT TO BE USED AS A MESSENGER
SERVICE THROUGH WHOM THE PARENTS COMMUNICATE WITH EACH OTHER. Thus,
the parents shall be courteous, low-key, and respectful of each other.
The goal of the parents should be to provide the child(ren) a safe,
secure, loving environment in which his/her development as a human
being is the priority of those who brought him/her into the world. "Reasonable" time
sharing with any child(ren) of the parties shall take place at such
times and places as the parties may agree upon. If the parties are
unable to reach an agreement as to the details of time sharing, the
time sharing schedule set forth below shall apply.
1. Primary Residential Parent: Weekdays: Every Monday from the beginning
of school through Thursday at the end of school. When there is no school,
every Monday from 8:00 a.m. to Thursday at 6:00 p.m. However, during
the summer vacation with the Secondary Residential Parent, the Primary
Residential Parent will have time with the child(ren) every Thursday
afternoon beginning at 6:00 and ending at Friday afternoon at 5:00
p.m., except during the Secondary Residential Parent's uninterrupted
Summer time with the child(ren).
Weekends: Every other weekend from the end of school on Friday afternoon
until the beginning of school on Monday morning. When there is no school,
every other weekend from Friday afternoon at 6:00 p.m. until Monday
morning at 8:00 a.m. During, the summer vacation with the Secondary
Residential Parent, the Primary Residential Parent will have time with
the child(ren) every other weekend from Friday afternoon at 6:00 p.m.
until Monday morning at 8:00 a.m., except during the Secondary Residential
Parent's uninterrupted Summer time with the child(ren).
Summer: Even Years - From 6:00 p.m. on the last day of school until
8:00 a.m. on the fifth Monday after the end of the school. Odd Years Ò From
8:00 a.m. on the fifth Monday after then end of school until the resumption
of school. During the Primary Residential Parent's summer time with
the child(ren), the Primary Residential Parent may utilize one two
week block of uninterrupted time with the child(ren). During the uninterrupted
block of time, the Secondary Residential Parent will not have weekend
or weekday time with the child(ren). The Primary Residential Parent
must notify the Secondary Residential Parent at least 60 days prior
to using the two week block of uninterrupted time with the child(ren).
2. Secondary Residential Parent: Weekdays: Every Thursday afternoon
from the end of school until Friday afternoon at the end of school.
When there is no school, every Thursday afternoon beginning at 6:00
p.m. and ending on Friday afternoon at 6:00 p.m. During summer vacation
with the Primary Residential Parent, the Secondary Residential Parent
will have time with the child(ren) every Thursday afternoon beginning
at 6:00 and ending at Friday afternoon at 6:00 p.m., except during
the Primary Residential Parent's uninterrupted summer time with the
child(ren).
Weekends: Every other weekend from the end of school on Friday afternoon
until the beginning of school on Monday morning. When there is no school,
every other weekend from Friday afternoon at 6:00 p.m. until Monday
morning at 8:00 a.m. During, summer vacation with the Primary Residential
Parent, the Secondary Residential Parent will have time with the child(ren)
every other weekend from Friday afternoon at 6:00 p.m. until Monday
morning at 8:00 a.m., except during the Primary Residential Parent's
uninterrupted summer time with the child(ren).
Summer: Odd Years - From 6:00 p.m. on the last day of school until
8:00 a.m. on the fifth Monday after the end of the school. Even Years Ò From
8:00 a.m. on the fifth Monday after then end of school until the resumption
of school. During the Secondary Residential Parent's Summer time with
the child(ren), the Secondary Residential Parent may utilize one two-week
block of uninterrupted time with the child(ren). During the uninterrupted
block of time, the Primary Residential Parent will not have weekend
or weekday time with the child(ren). The Secondary Residential Parent
must notify the Primary Residential Parent at least 60 days prior to
using the two-week block of uninterrupted time with the child(ren).
3. Holidays: Holiday time with the child(ren) preempts normal weekday,
weekend and summer time with the child(ren). The normal weekend rotation
resumes immediately following any holiday interruption. Thus for example,
if the Primary Residential Parent has a weekend with the child(ren)
and the following weekend, which would normally be the Secondary Residential
Parent's weekend with the child(ren), is a holiday [the Secondary Residential
Parent's holiday with the child(ren)], then the weekend following the
holiday, the Secondary Residential Parent will have normal weekend
time with the child(ren).
A. Winter Vacation: Secondary Residential Parent - Even Years: From
6:00 p.m. on the Friday beginning school vacation through 8:00 a.m.
on December 26. Odd Years: From 8:00 a.m. December 26 through the resumption
of school.
Primary Residential Parent - Odd Years: From 6:00 p.m. on the Friday
beginning school vacation through 8:00 a.m. on December 26. Even Years:
From 8:00 a.m. December 26 through the resumption of school.
B. Spring Vacation: Secondary Residential Parent Ò Even Years: The
entire Spring Vacation from end of school until the resumption of school.
Primary Residential Parent Ò Odd Years: The entire Spring Vacation
from end of school until the resumption of school.
C. Thanksgiving: Secondary Residential Parent - Odd Years: The entire
holiday from the end of school until the resumption of school.
Primary Residential Parent - Even Years: The entire holiday from the
end of school until the resumption of school.
D. Mother's Day/Father's Day: To be spent with the parent being honored
by the holiday in question from 8:00 a.m. on Sunday until 8:00 a.m.
the following Monday morning. This time sharing preempts contact as
otherwise set forth in this schedule.
E. Children's Birthdays: Birthdays shall be celebrated with the Parent
entitled to contact on that day.
F. Labor Day Weekend: Secondary Residential Parent Ò Even Years
Primary Residential Parent Ò Odd Years
G. Memorial Day Weekend: Secondary Residential Parent Ò Odd Years
Primary Residential Parent Ò Even Years
H. Fourth of July: Secondary Residential Parent - Even Years from 10
a.m. on the 4th of July through 10:00 a.m. on the 5th of July.
Primary Residential Parent Ò Odd Years from 10 a.m. on the 4th of July
through 10:00 a.m. on the 5th of July.
I. Halloween: Secondary Residential Parent Ò Even Years from 3:30 p.m.
on Halloween until 8:00 a.m. the following morning. If the day after
Halloween is a school day the Secondary residential Parent shall return
the child(ren) to school in the morning.
Primary Residential Parent Ò Odd Years from 3:30 p.m. on Halloween
until 8:00 a.m. the following morning. If the day after Halloween is
a school day the Primary Residential Parent shall return the child(ren)
to school in the morning.
J. Non-specified Holidays: Should the parents jointly recognize a holiday
not specifically mentioned each parent shall cooperate with the other
in providing contact on alternating years with the other parent for
the entire holiday and in working out beginning and ending times for
such contact.
1. Time Sharing Exchanges: All time sharing exchanges while school
is in session will occur at the child(ren)'s school. However, during
holidays, summer, and other times when time sharing does not begin
or end based upon the school schedule, the Secondary Residential Parent
shall pick up the child(ren) from the Primary Residential Parent's
home at the beginning of time sharing and the Primary Residential Parent
shall pick up the child(ren) from the Secondary Residential Parent's
home at the end of time sharing.
2. Telephonic Communication: Each party shall allow open telephonic
communication between the child(ren) and the other parent on a daily
basis.
3. Right of First Refusal: If either parent intends to be absent from
the home overnight during time sharing with the child(ren), he/she
must give the other parent the option of having time sharing with the
child(ren) for the night in question. When the Primary Residential
Parent knows that he/she will be out overnight, notification must be
given to the Secondary Residential Parent. The Secondary Residential
Parent must notify the Primary Residential parent within two (2) hours
of learning of the option whether he/she intends to exercise it. If
the Secondary residential parent decides to exercise the option, he/she
shall pick up and return the child at the time stipulated by the Primary
Residential Parent. When the Secondary Residential Parent knows that
he/she will be out overnight, notification must be given to the Primary
Residential Parent. The Primary Residential Parent must notify the
Secondary Residential parent within two (2) hours of learning of the
option whether he/she intends to exercise it. If the Primary residential
parent decides to exercise the option, he/she shall pick up and return
the child at the time stipulated by the Secondary Residential Parent.
If either parent has time sharing during a non-specified holiday including
but not limited to teacher planning days and that parent intends to
leave the child(ren) for 3 hours or more with a babysitter, daycare
worker, or person other than a family member, that parent must give
the other parent the option of having time sharing with the child(ren)
for the non-specified holiday. The parent who has the option of time
sharing with the child(ren) must notify the other parent whether he/she
intends to exercise the option within two (2) hours of learning of
the option to have time sharing.
4. Out-of-Town Travel: If either parent plans to travel Out-of-town
with the child(ren) for more than one (1) day, that parent must provide
the other parent with a general itinerary including the dates of departure
and return and addresses and telephone numbers for the locations where
the child(ren) will be staying.
5. Emergencies: Each parent shall notify the other immediately (no
later than 3 hours) of any emergency pertaining to any child of the
parties.
6. Exchange of Information: Neither parent shall conceal the whereabouts
of any child of the parties, and each parent will keep the other advised
at all times of the residential addresses and phone numbers where the
child(ren) will be staying while in the care of either parent. In addition,
each parent shall make the other aware of the name, address, and telephone
number of all daycare providers and health care providers.
7. Effective Date: This time sharing schedule shall become effective
on the second Thursday following the entry of the order to which this
schedule is attached. The Secondary Residential Parent shall have time
sharing on the first weekend following the effective date of this schedule.
8. Cancellations: Cancellation of a specific time sharing period can
only occur with the consent of both parents. The request for cancellation
must be given to the other parent at least 3 days in advance of the
time sharing period for which cancellation is requested. If the cancellation
is not agreed to by both parents, the parent seeking to cancel time
sharing must arrange and pay for babysitting, child care or other appropriate
supervision of the child for the time sharing period.
GENERAL AND SPECIFIC TIME SHARING ISSUES
FOR THE PARENTS OF CHILDREN OF DIVORCE
Following a divorce or separation, parents need to cooperate in their
efforts to help their children continue to grow emotionally, socially,
and intellectually, and to insure that their children continue to have
meaningful relationships with both the parent with whom they primarily
live (the "primary caregiver" or "primary residential parent") and
with their other parent (one of their "secondary caregivers" or their "secondary
residential parent").
The Model Parental Time Sharing Schedule is intended to minimize the
harm done to children when their parents divorce or separate. It is
written from the standpoint of children's needs and attempt to guide
parents seeking to meet the best interests of their children.
In developing schedules for contact between children and their parents
following a separation or divorce, the following factors need to be
considered:
A. MINIMIZE LOSS
Children experience divorce as a series of significant losses. To a
child, divorce means losing home, family life, loving parents who care
about each other, pets, financial security, relationships with extended
family, familiar schools, sports activities, and a daily schedule.
Children often feel abandoned and uprooted. The disrupting effect of
divorce on their lives can have profound consequences for children
as they reach adulthood. Respect your children's pain by eliminating
as many changes and losses as possible.
B. MAXIMIZE RELATIONSHIPS
Encourage all relationships which existed between your children and
others before the divorce (both parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles,
cousins, close adult friends, etc.). Your children will most likely
keep the feeling of family when they continue to have pleasant, free
access to both parents and extended family. Your children's identity
depends on their feeling that they belong to both families. This identity
requires that your children spend time with both sides of the family.
If your children lose contact with parts of their family, their sense
of identity can be distorted, even crippled. Treasure the involvement
of extended family in your children's lives.
Encourage and support the other parent in accepting an active parenting
role. Share the burden of responsibilities (laundry, transportation,
doctor visits, teacher conferences, etc.) as well as the joyous occasions
(holidays, birthday parties, movies, sports outings, trips, etc.).
Respect the basic nature or temperament of your children, as well as
the temperamental match or fit between each child and each parent.
Consider the match of each parent's interests and each child's activities.
Provide as much direct contact and positive involvement as possible
between each child and each parent. When parents are able to remain
in the same geographical location, relationships are more likely to
be maximized.
Never make your children feel guilty about enjoying their time with
their other parent; enjoyment of that time is a tribute to the security
that both you and the other parent have instilled in your children
and suggests that your children are learning to trust and explore a
wide range of healthy relationships.
Reassure your children that they are not to blame for the divorce and
that both parents still love them. Try to avoid blaming the other parent
(it is destructive to children's security and self concepts when they
are compelled to "take sides" after a divorce). You should also avoid
confiding details of your marital problems to your children; although
they may initially want the details and may want to alleviate your
pain/anger by "taking sides" with you, they may ultimately resent you
for confusing them and increasing their anxieties about their freedom
to love and relate comfortably to both of their parents.
C. INCREASE SECURITY
Your children are likely to feel protected from losses when allowed
to remain in the safety, consistency, and support of old, familiar
surroundings. Children feel secure when they have positive time with
both parents, the familiarity of established family rules, as well
as being allowed to continue in previously established religious, school,
and related activities. Children do best when their parents live in
close proximity, especially if they share the same school district.
Children can then have the reassurance of familiar after-school friends
at both parents' homes. Children also feel most secure when their parents
share responsibility for their after-school care. Parents need to talk
about ways to build certainty, structure, and stability in their children's
lives.
D. AVOID CONFLICT
Scientific research verifies that your children will suffer both now
and later if they frequently see their parents in conflict. Raised
voices, arguing, hateful remarks, and physical altercations are not
suitable for child viewing. Children are also harmed when they hear
one parent say bad things about the other parent. If one parent directly
or indirectly creates an image of the other parent that is in any way
negative, the child's own self-image will be assaulted. Children will
only feel as good about themselves as they do about each parent.
A good procedure for divorced/separated parents to follow is to never
try to discuss child issues and adult issues in the same conversation.
When you are talking with your former spouse about child issues (scheduling
visits, vacation plans, school or medical problems, etc.), stick to
those topics and do not allow the conversation to drift into discussions
of problems between yourself and your former spouse (money, angry issues,
etc.). Save those topics for another discussion at another time and
never discuss them in the presence of your children. If you and your
children's other parent simply cannot avoid fighting and arguing when
you begin/end visits, you might want to consider enlisting the help
of another person (grandparent, mutual friend, babysitter, etc.) who
will agree to serve as a "neutral zone" where both parents can bring
the children for transfer and avoid contact with each other.
E. AGE RELATED NEEDS
Children of different ages need and benefit from different parenting
arrangements. Parents should try to be flexible and should try to tailor
their schedules as much as possible to reflect their children's developmental
needs and individual requirements. You can expect that, as your children
get older, you will need to be more flexible and will need to work
hard at communicating effectively and compromising fairly with both
your children and their other parent.
Model Parental Time
Sharing Schedule
(Suggested In-State Where the Parents
Reside More than 45 Miles Apart)
Basic Assumptions and Goals
This schedule assumes that the parents are prepared to share the difficult
responsibility of raising children in separate homes and are mature
and responsible enough to do so. Shared parental responsibility means
that each parent has full rights and duties with respect to their child(ren).
The parents must confer with each other so that major decisions affecting
the child(ren) are made jointly. Issues dealing with school, discipline,
religious upbringing, and health are examples of areas where the parents
must confer. Each parent is entitled to the child's medical, dental,
and school records. Florida Statute þ 61.13 (2)(b)(3) specifically
requires that "access to records and information pertaining to a minor
child, including, but not limited to medical records may not be denied
to a parent because the parent is not the child's primary residential
parent."
This schedule is designed to help accomplish three goals: 1) to assure
that child(ren) of parents who do not live together will have an opportunity
to develop a relationship with each parent that will be loving and
meaningful, 2) to permit each parent to spend as much quality time
with their children as is consistent with the child's developmental
needs, and 3) to give guidance to the parents as to what is expected
of them regarding their obligations to the other parent.
If this Parental Time Sharing Schedule is to be successful, the relationship
between the parents must be businesslike. THE CHILD(REN) IS NOT TO
BE EXPOSED TO HOSTILITY, CONFLICT, RECRIMINATIONS, OR ARGUMENT BETWEEN
HIS/HER PARENTS. FURTHERMORE, THE CHILD IS NOT TO BE USED AS A MESSENGER
SERVICE THROUGH WHOM THE PARENTS COMMUNICATE WITH EACH OTHER. Thus,
the parents shall be courteous, low-key, and respectful of each other.
The goal of the parents should be to provide the child(ren) a safe,
secure, loving environment in which his/her development as a human
being is the priority of those who brought him/her into the world. "Reasonable" time
sharing with any child(ren) of the parties shall take place at such
times and places as the parties may agree upon. If the parties are
unable to reach an agreement as to the details of time sharing, the
time sharing schedule set forth below shall apply.
1. Primary Residential Parent: Weekdays: Every Monday from the beginning
of school through Friday at the end of school. When there is no school,
every Monday from 8:00 a.m. to Friday at 6:00 p.m.
Weekends: Every other weekend from the end of school on Friday afternoon
until the beginning of school on Monday morning. When there is no school,
every other weekend from Friday afternoon at 6:00 p.m. until Monday
morning at 8:00 a.m. During the summer vacation with the Secondary
Residential Parent, the Primary Residential Parent will have time with
the child(ren) every other weekend from Friday afternoon at 6:00 p.m.
until Monday morning at 8:00 a.m., except during the Secondary Residential
Parent's uninterrupted summer time with the child(ren).
Summer: From 6:00 p.m. on the last day of school until 6:00 p.m. on
the second Friday after the end of the school and from after 6:00 p.m.
on the eighth Sunday following the conclusion of the school until the
resumption of school. During summer vacation with the child(ren), the
Primary Residential Parent may utilize one two week block of uninterrupted
time with the child(ren). During the uninterrupted block of time, the
Secondary Residential Parent will not have weekend or weekday time
with the children. The Primary Residential Parent must notify the Secondary
Residential Parent at least 60 days prior to using the two week block
of uninterrupted time with the child(ren).
2. Secondary Residential Parent: Weekends: Every other weekend from
the end of school on Friday afternoon until the beginning of school
on Monday morning. When there is no school, every other weekend from
Friday afternoon at 6:00 p.m. until Monday morning at 8:00 a.m. During
summer vacation with the Primary Residential Parent, the Secondary
Residential Parent will have time with the child(ren) every other weekend
from Friday afternoon at 6:00 p.m. until Monday morning at 8:00 a.m.,
except during the Primary Residential Parent's uninterrupted summer
time with the child(ren).
Summer: From 6:00 p.m. on the second Friday after the end of the school
year through 6:00 p.m. on the eighth Sunday following the conclusion
of the school year. During this period of time, the Secondary Residential
Parent may utilize one two week block of uninterrupted time with the
child(ren). During the uninterrupted block of time, the Primary Residential
Parent will not have weekend or weekday time with the children. The
Secondary Residential Parent must notify the Primary Residential Parent
at least 60 days prior to using the two week block of uninterrupted
time with the child(ren).
3. Holidays: Holiday time with the child(ren) preempts normal weekday,
weekend and summer time with the child(ren). The normal weekend rotation
resumes immediately following any holiday interruption. Thus for example,
if the Primary Residential Parent has a weekend with the child(ren)
and the following weekend, which would normally be the Secondary Residential
Parent's weekend with the child(ren), is a holiday [the Secondary Residential
Parent's holiday with the child(ren)], then the weekend following the
holiday, the Secondary Residential Parent will have normal weekend
time with the child(ren).
A. Winter Vacation: Secondary Residential Parent - Even Years: From
6:00 p.m. on the Friday beginning school vacation through 8:00 a.m.
on December 26. Odd Years: From 8:00 a.m. December 26 through the resumption
of school.
Primary Residential Parent - Odd Years: From 6:00 p.m. on the Friday
beginning school vacation through 8:00 a.m. on December 26. Even Years:
From 8:00 a.m. December 26 through the resumption of school.
B. Spring Vacation: Secondary Residential Parent Ò The entire Spring
Vacation annually from end of school until the resumption of school.
C. Thanksgiving: Secondary Residential Parent - Odd Years: The entire
holiday from the end of school until the resumption of school.
Primary Residential Parent - Even Years: The entire holiday from the
end of school until the resumption of school.
D. Mother's Day/Father's Day: To be spent with the parent being honored
by the holiday in question from 8:00 a.m. on Sunday until 8:00 a.m.
the following Monday morning. This time sharing preempts contact as
otherwise set forth in this schedule.
E. Children's Birthdays: Birthdays shall be celebrated with the Parent
entitled to contact on that day.
F. Labor Day Weekend: Secondary Residential Parent Ò Even Years
Primary Residential Parent Ò Odd Years
G. Memorial Day Weekend: Secondary Residential Parent Ò Odd Years
Primary Residential Parent Ò Even Years
H. Fourth of July: Secondary Residential Parent - Even Years from 10
a.m. on the 4th of July through 10:00 a.m. on the 5th of July.
Primary Residential Parent Ò Odd Years from 10 a.m. on the 4th of July
through 10:00 a.m. on the 5th of July.
I. Halloween: Secondary Residential Parent Ò Even Years from 3:30 p.m.
on Halloween until 8:00 a.m. the following morning. If the day after
Halloween is a school day the Secondary residential Parent shall return
the child(ren) to school in the morning.
Primary Residential Parent Ò Odd Years from 3:30 p.m. on Halloween
until 8:00 a.m. the following morning. If the day after Halloween is
a school day the Primary Residential Parent shall return the child(ren)
to school in the morning.
J. Non-specified Holidays: Should the parents jointly recognize a holiday
not specifically mentioned each parent shall cooperate with the other
in providing contact on alternating years with the other parent for
the entire holiday and in working out beginning and ending times for
such contact.
1. Time Sharing Exchanges: All time sharing exchanges while school
is in session will occur at the child(ren)'s school. However, during
holidays, summer, and other times when time sharing does not begin
or end based upon the school schedule, the Secondary Residential Parent
shall pick up the child(ren) from the Primary Residential Parent's
home at the beginning of time sharing and the Primary Residential Parent
shall pick up the child(ren) from the Secondary Residential Parent's
home at the end of time sharing.
2. Telephonic Communication: Each party shall allow open telephonic
communication between the child(ren) and the other parent on a daily
basis.
3. Out-of-Town Travel: If either parent plans to travel Out-of-town
with the child(ren) for more than one (1) day, that parent must provide
the other parent with a general itinerary including the dates of departure
and return and addresses and telephone numbers for the locations where
the child(ren) will be staying.
4. Emergencies: Each parent shall notify the other immediately (no
later than 3 hours) of any emergency pertaining to any child of the
parties.
5. Exchange of Information: Neither parent shall conceal the whereabouts
of any child of the parties, and each parent will keep the other advised
at all times of the residential addresses and phone numbers where the
child(ren) will be staying while in the care of either parent. In addition,
each parent shall make the other aware of the name, address, and telephone
number of all daycare providers and health care providers.
6. Effective Date: This time sharing schedule shall become effective
on the second Thursday following the entry of the order to which this
schedule is attached. The Secondary Residential Parent shall have time
sharing on the first weekend following the effective date of this schedule.
7. Cancellations: The Secondary Residential Parent may cancel time
sharing periods which are 72 hours or less in duration by providing
the Primary Residential Parent notice no less than 14 day prior the
time sharing period which the Secondary Residential Parent wishes to
cancel. Cancellation of a specific time sharing period of longer than
72 hours in duration can only occur with the consent of both parents.
The request for cancellation of a specific time sharing period of longer
than 72 hours in duration must be given to the other parent at least
3 days in advance of the time sharing period for which cancellation
is requested. If the cancellation of a specific time sharing period
of longer than 72 hours in duration is not agreed to by both parents,
the parent seeking to cancel time sharing must arrange and pay for
babysitting, child care or other appropriate supervision of the child
for the time sharing period.
GENERAL AND SPECIFIC TIME SHARING ISSUES
FOR THE PARENTS OF CHILDREN OF DIVORCE
Following a divorce or separation, parents need to cooperate in their
efforts to help their children continue to grow emotionally, socially,
and intellectually, and to insure that their children continue to have
meaningful relationships with both the parent with whom they primarily
live (the "primary caregiver" or "primary residential parent") and
with their other parent (one of their "secondary caregivers" or their "secondary
residential parent").
The Model Parental Time Sharing Schedule is intended to minimize the
harm done to children when their parents divorce or separate. It is
written from the standpoint of children's needs and attempt to guide
parents seeking to meet the best interests of their children.
In developing schedules for contact between children and their parents
following a separation or divorce, the following factors need to be
considered:
A. MINIMIZE LOSS
Children experience divorce as a series of significant losses. To a
child, divorce means losing home, family life, loving parents who care
about each other, pets, financial security, relationships with extended
family, familiar schools, sports activities, and a daily schedule.
Children often feel abandoned and uprooted. The disrupting effect of
divorce on their lives can have profound consequences for children
as they reach adulthood. Respect your children's pain by eliminating
as many changes and losses as possible.
B. MAXIMIZE RELATIONSHIPS
Encourage all relationships which existed between your children and
others before the divorce (both parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles,
cousins, close adult friends, etc.). Your children will most likely
keep the feeling of family when they continue to have pleasant, free
access to both parents and extended family. Your children's identity
depends on their feeling that they belong to both families. This identity
requires that your children spend time with both sides of the family.
If your children lose contact with parts of their family, their sense
of identity can be distorted, even crippled. Treasure the involvement
of extended family in your children's lives.
Encourage and support the other parent in accepting an active parenting
role. Share the burden of responsibilities (laundry, transportation,
doctor visits, teacher conferences, etc.) as well as the joyous occasions
(holidays, birthday parties, movies, sports outings, trips, etc.).
Respect the basic nature or temperament of your children, as well as
the temperamental match or fit between each child and each parent.
Consider the match of each parent's interests and each child's activities.
Provide as much direct contact and positive involvement as possible
between each child and each parent. When parents are able to remain
in the same geographical location, relationships are more likely to
be maximized.
Never make your children feel guilty about enjoying their time with
their other parent; enjoyment of that time is a tribute to the security
that both you and the other parent have instilled in your children
and suggests that your children are learning to trust and explore a
wide range of healthy relationships.
Reassure your children that they are not to blame for the divorce and
that both parents still love them. Try to avoid blaming the other parent
(it is destructive to children's security and self concepts when they
are compelled to "take sides" after a divorce). You should also avoid
confiding details of your marital problems to your children; although
they may initially want the details and may want to alleviate your
pain/anger by "taking sides" with you, they may ultimately resent you
for confusing them and increasing their anxieties about their freedom
to love and relate comfortably to both of their parents.
C. INCREASE SECURITY
Your children are likely to feel protected from losses when allowed
to remain in the safety, consistency, and support of old, familiar
surroundings. Children feel secure when they have positive time with
both parents, the familiarity of established family rules, as well
as being allowed to continue in previously established religious, school,
and related activities. Children do best when their parents live in
close proximity, especially if they share the same school district.
Children can then have the reassurance of familiar after-school friends
at both parents' homes. Children also feel most secure when their parents
share responsibility for their after-school care. Parents need to talk
about ways to build certainty, structure, and stability in their children's
lives.
D. AVOID CONFLICT
Scientific research verifies that your children will suffer both now
and later if they frequently see their parents in conflict. Raised
voices, arguing, hateful remarks, and physical altercations are not
suitable for child viewing. Children are also harmed when they hear
one parent say bad things about the other parent. If one parent directly
or indirectly creates an image of the other parent that is in any way
negative, the child's own self-image will be assaulted. Children will
only feel as good about themselves as they do about each parent.
A good procedure for divorced/separated parents to follow is to never
try to discuss child issues and adult issues in the same conversation.
When you are talking with your former spouse about child issues (scheduling
visits, vacation plans, school or medical problems, etc.), stick to
those topics and do not allow the conversation to drift into discussions
of problems between yourself and your former spouse (money, angry issues,
etc.). Save those topics for another discussion at another time and
never discuss them in the presence of your children. If you and your
children's other parent simply cannot avoid fighting and arguing when
you begin/end visits, you might want to consider enlisting the help
of another person (grandparent, mutual friend, babysitter, etc.) who
will agree to serve as a "neutral zone" where both parents can bring
the children for transfer and avoid contact with each other.
E. AGE RELATED NEEDS
Children of different ages need and benefit from different parenting
arrangements. Parents should try to be flexible and should try to tailor
their schedules as much as possible to reflect their children's developmental
needs and individual requirements. You can expect that, as your children
get older, you will need to be more flexible and will need to work
hard at communicating effectively and compromising fairly with both
your children and their other parent.
Model Parental Time
Sharing Schedule
(Suggested Out-of-State)
Basic Assumptions and Goals
This schedule assumes that the parents are prepared to share the difficult
responsibility of raising children in separate homes and are mature
and responsible enough to do so. Shared parental responsibility means
that each parent has full rights and duties with respect to their child(ren).
The parents must confer with each other so that major decisions affecting
the child(ren) are made jointly. Issues dealing with school, discipline,
religious upbringing, and health are examples of areas where the parents
must confer. Each parent is entitled to the child's medical, dental,
and school records. Florida Statute þ 61.13 (2)(b)(3) specifically
requires that "access to records and information pertaining to a minor
child, including, but not limited to medical records may not be denied
to a parent because the parent is not the child's primary residential
parent."
This schedule is designed to help accomplish three goals: 1) to assure
that child(ren) of parents who do not live together will have an opportunity
to develop a relationship with each parent that will be loving and
meaningful, 2) to permit each parent to spend as much quality time
with their children as is consistent with the child's developmental
needs, and 3) to give guidance to the parents as to what is expected
of them regarding their obligations to the other parent.
If this Parental Time Sharing Schedule is to be successful, the relationship
between the parents must be businesslike. THE CHILD(REN) IS NOT TO
BE EXPOSED TO HOSTILITY, CONFLICT, RECRIMINATIONS, OR ARGUMENT BETWEEN
HIS/HER PARENTS. FURTHERMORE, THE CHILD IS NOT TO BE USED AS A MESSENGER
SERVICE THROUGH WHOM THE PARENTS COMMUNICATE WITH EACH OTHER. Thus,
the parents shall be courteous, low-key, and respectful of each other.
The goal of the parents should be to provide the child(ren) a safe,
secure, loving environment in which his/her development as a human
being is the priority of those who brought him/her into the world.
"Reasonable" time sharing with any child(ren)
of the parties shall take place at such times and
places as the parties may agree upon. If the parties
are unable to reach an agreement as to the details
of time sharing, the time sharing schedule set forth
below shall apply.
1. Primary Residential Parent:
Weekdays: Every Monday from the beginning of school through
Friday at the end of school. When there is no school, every Monday
from 8:00 a.m. to Friday at 6:00 p.m. Weekday time sharing does not
apply during the Secondary Residential Parent's summer time with the
child(ren).
Weekends: Every weekend from the end of school
on Friday afternoon until the beginning of school
on Monday morning except the first full weekend of
each month. When there is no school, every weekend
except the first full weekend of the month from Friday
afternoon at 6:00 p.m. until Monday morning at 8:00
a.m. Weekend time sharing does not apply during the
Secondary Residential Parent's summer time with the
child(ren).
Summer: Even Years: From 6:00 p.m. on the
eighth Sunday following the conclusion of the school
until the resumption of school. Odd Years: From the
end of school until 6:00 p.m. on the third Sunday
following the conclusion of school and from 8:00
p.m. on the Sunday prior to the resumption of school
through the resumption of school.
2. Secondary Residential Parent:
Weekends: The first full weekend of each month
from the end of school on Friday afternoon until
8:00 p.m. Sunday night. When there is no school,
the first weekend of the month from Friday afternoon
at 6:00 p.m. until Monday morning at 10:00 a.m..
If there is a long weekend during any month as a
result of unspecified holiday (example: teacher planning
day) the Secondary Residential Parent may have time
sharing with the child(ren) on that long weekend
instead of the first weekend of the month if the
Secondary Residential Parent notifies the Primary
Residential Parent at least 60 days in advance. Weekend
time sharing does not apply during the Primary Residential
Parent's summer time with the child(ren).
Summer: Even Years: From 6:00 p.m. on the
last day of school through 6:00 p.m. on the eighth
Sunday following the conclusion of the school year.
Odd Years: From 6:00 p.m. on the third Sunday following
the conclusion of school until 8:00 p.m. on the Sunday
prior to the resumption of school.
3. Holidays: Holiday time with the child(ren)
preempts normal weekday, weekend and summer time
with the child(ren). The normal weekend rotation
resumes immediately following any holiday interruption.
Thus for example, if the Primary Residential Parent
has a weekend with the child(ren) and the following
weekend, which would normally be the Secondary Residential
Parent's weekend with the child(ren), is a holiday
[the Secondary Residential Parent's holiday with
the child(ren)], then the weekend following the holiday,
the Secondary Residential Parent will have normal
weekend time with the child(ren).
A. Winter Vacation: Secondary Residential
Parent - Even Years: From 6:00 p.m. on the Friday
beginning school vacation through 8:00 a.m. on December
26. Odd Years: From 8:00 a.m. December 26 through
the resumption of school. Primary Residential Parent
- Odd Years: From 6:00 p.m. on the Friday beginning
school vacation through 8:00 a.m. on December 26.
Even Years: From 8:00 a.m. December 26 through the
resumption of school.
B. Spring Vacation: Secondary Residential
Parent Ò The entire Spring Vacation annually from
end of school until the resumption of school. C.
Thanksgiving: Secondary Residential Parent -
Odd Years: The entire holiday from the end of school
until the resumption of school. Primary Residential
Parent - Even Years: The entire holiday from the
end of school until the resumption of school.
D. Mother's Day/Father's Day: To be spent
with the parent being honored by the holiday in question
from 8:00 a.m. on Sunday until 8:00 a.m. the following
Monday morning. This time sharing preempts contact
as otherwise set forth in this schedule.
E. Children's Birthdays: Birthdays shall be
celebrated with the Parent entitled to contact on
that day.
F. Labor Day Weekend: Secondary Residential
Parent Ò Even Years Primary Residential Parent Ò Odd
Years
G. Memorial Day Weekend: Secondary Residential
Parent Ò Odd Years Primary Residential Parent Ò Even
Years
H. Fourth of July: Secondary Residential Parent
- Even Years from 10 a.m. on the 4th of July through
10:00 a.m. on the 5th of July. Primary Residential
Parent Ò Odd Years from 10 a.m. on the 4th of July
through 10:00 a.m. on the 5th of July.
I. Halloween: Secondary Residential Parent Ò Even
Years from 3:30 p.m. on Halloween until 8:00 a.m.
the following morning. If the day after Halloween
is a school day the Secondary residential Parent
shall return the child(ren) to school in the morning.
Primary Residential Parent Ò Odd Years from 3:30
p.m. on Halloween until 8:00 a.m. the following morning.
If the day after Halloween is a school day the Primary
Residential Parent shall return the child(ren) to
school in the morning.
J. Non-specified Holidays: Should the parents
jointly recognize a holiday not specifically mentioned
each parent shall cooperate with the other in providing
contact on alternating years with the other parent
for the entire holiday and in working out beginning
and ending times for such contact.
4. Time Sharing Exchanges: Arrangements for
time sharing exchanges shall be determined by agreement
of the parties or by order of the court.
5. Telephonic Communication: Each party shall
allow open telephonic communication between the child(ren)
and the other parent on a daily basis.
6. Out-of-Town Travel: If either parent plans
to travel Out-of-town with the child(ren) for more
than one (1) day, that parent must provide the other
parent with a general itinerary including the dates
of departure and return and addresses and telephone
numbers for the locations where the child(ren) will
be staying.
7. Emergencies: Each parent shall notify the
other immediately (no later than 3 hours) of any
emergency pertaining to any child of the parties. 8.
Exchange of Information: Neither parent shall
conceal the whereabouts of any child of the parties,
and each parent will keep the other advised at all
times of the residential addresses and phone numbers
where the child(ren) will be staying while in the
care of either parent. In addition, each parent shall
make the other aware of the name, address, and telephone
number of all daycare providers and health care providers.
9. Effective Date This time sharing schedule
shall become effective on the second Thursday following
the entry of the order to which this schedule is
attached.
10. Cancellations: The Secondary Residential
Parent may cancel time sharing periods which are
72 hours or less in duration by providing the Primary
Residential Parent notice no less than 14 day prior
the time sharing period which the Secondary Residential
Parent wishes to cancel. Cancellation of a specific
time sharing period of longer than 72 hours in duration
can only occur with the consent of both parents.
The request for cancellation of a specific time sharing
period of longer than 72 hours in duration must be
given to the other parent at least 3 days in advance
of the time sharing period for which cancellation
is requested. If the cancellation of a specific time
sharing period of longer than 72 hours in duration
is not agreed to by both parents, the parent seeking
to cancel time sharing must arrange and pay for babysitting,
child care or other appropriate supervision of the
child for the time sharing period.
GENERAL AND SPECIFIC TIME SHARING ISSUES FOR THE PARENTS OF CHILDREN
OF DIVORCE
Following a divorce or separation, parents need to
cooperate in their efforts to help their children
continue to grow emotionally, socially,
and intellectually, and to insure that their children continue to have
meaningful relationships with both the parent with whom they primarily
live (the "primary caregiver" or "primary residential parent") and
with their other parent (one of their "secondary caregivers" or their "secondary
residential parent").
The Model Parental Time Sharing Schedule is intended to minimize the
harm done to children when their parents divorce or separate. It is
written from the standpoint of children's needs and attempt to guide
parents seeking to meet the best interests of their children.
In developing schedules for contact between children and their parents
following a separation or divorce, the following factors need to be
considered:
A. MINIMIZE LOSS Children experience divorce
as a series of significant losses. To a child, divorce
means losing home, family life, loving parents who
care about each other, pets, financial security,
relationships with extended family, familiar schools,
sports activities, and a daily schedule. Children
often feel abandoned and uprooted. The disrupting
effect of divorce on their lives can have profound
consequences for children as they reach adulthood.
Respect your children's pain by eliminating as many
changes and losses as possible.
B. MAXIMIZE RELATIONSHIPS Encourage all relationships
which existed between your children and others before
the divorce (both parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles,
cousins, close adult friends, etc.). Your children
will most likely keep the feeling of family when
they continue to have pleasant, free access to both
parents and extended family. Your children's identity
depends on their feeling that they belong to both
families. This identity requires that your children
spend time with both sides of the family. If your
children lose contact with parts of their family,
their sense of identity can be distorted, even crippled.
Treasure the involvement of extended family in your
children's lives.
Encourage and support the other parent in accepting an active parenting
role. Share the burden of responsibilities (laundry, transportation,
doctor visits, teacher conferences, etc.) as well as the joyous occasions
(holidays, birthday parties, movies, sports outings, trips, etc.).
Respect the basic nature or temperament of your children, as well as
the temperamental match or fit between each child and each parent.
Consider the match of each parent's interests and each child's activities.
Provide as much direct contact and positive involvement as possible
between each child and each parent. When parents are able to remain
in the same geographical location, relationships are more likely to
be maximized.
Never make your children feel guilty about enjoying their time with
their other parent; enjoyment of that time is a tribute to the security
that both you and the other parent have instilled in your children
and suggests that your children are learning to trust and explore a
wide range of healthy relationships.
Reassure your children that they are not to blame for the divorce and
that both parents still love them. Try to avoid blaming the other parent
(it is destructive to children's security and self concepts when they
are compelled to "take sides" after a divorce). You should also avoid
confiding details of your marital problems to your children; although
they may initially want the details and may want to alleviate your
pain/anger by "taking sides" with you, they may ultimately resent you
for confusing them and increasing their anxieties about their freedom
to love and relate comfortably to both of their parents.
C. INCREASE SECURITY Your children are likely
to feel protected from losses when allowed to remain
in the safety, consistency, and support of old, familiar
surroundings. Children feel secure when they have
positive time with both parents, the familiarity
of established family rules, as well as being allowed
to continue in previously established religious,
school, and related activities. Children do best
when their parents live in close proximity, especially
if they share the same school district. Children
can then have the reassurance of familiar after-school
friends at both parents' homes. Children also feel
most secure when their parents share responsibility
for their after-school care. Parents need to talk
about ways to build certainty, structure, and stability
in their children's lives.
D. AVOID CONFLICT Scientific research verifies
that your children will suffer both now and later
if they frequently see their parents in conflict.
Raised voices, arguing, hateful remarks, and physical
altercations are not suitable for child viewing.
Children are also harmed when they hear one parent
say bad things about the other parent. If one parent
directly or indirectly creates an image of the other
parent that is in any way negative, the child's own
self-image will be assaulted. Children will only
feel as good about themselves as they do about each
parent. A good procedure for divorced/separated parents
to follow is to never try to discuss child issues
and adult issues in the same conversation. When you
are talking with your former spouse about child issues
(scheduling visits, vacation plans, school or medical
problems, etc.), stick to those topics and do not
allow the conversation to drift into discussions
of problems between yourself and your former spouse
(money, angry issues, etc.). Save those topics for
another discussion at another time and never discuss
them in the presence of your children. If you and
your children's other parent simply cannot avoid
fighting and arguing when you begin/end visits, you
might want to consider enlisting the help of another
person (grandparent, mutual friend, babysitter, etc.)
who will agree to serve as a "neutral zone" where
both parents can bring the children for transfer
and avoid contact with each other.
E. AGE RELATED NEEDS Children of different
ages need and benefit from different parenting arrangements.
Parents should try to be flexible and should try
to tailor their schedules as much as possible to
reflect their children's developmental needs and
individual requirements. You can expect that, as
your children get older, you will need to be more
flexible and will need to work hard at communicating
effectively and compromising fairly with both your
children and their other parent.
